Life is all but a beautiful lie

pre examination stress

2005-09-15T13:01:00.000-07:00

its the [PRE-examination stress]
me ht ct and sh are in the project rm now.
the pathology test is advancing, at ard 4pm, i tink.
cudnt care less. so hard to memorise.
they are all holding on to the paper, but god knows how many are engraving the all-so-similar information in their tiny heads. haha.

;) none of us pass in the first test. but i m already very happy. i tink i score though not v well but a satisfactory fail. hahaha.

going crazy. just finish my clinical optometry practical test.
dont know fail or pass.
haha.
i care abt my studies. but does it care abt me?

life is whirling.
i tink i m walking too fast.

haha. i wanna migrate to a countryside.
after the examination i wanna learn swimming. ct n sh promise to teach me. hehehe.
lets all schedule the days we are left with before a new semester starts.
life will be good.

life going downhill

2005-06-28T19:46:00.000-07:00

oh no..
bad things happen when life is too good..
argh. been having on-offs fever and got knows what.
i fainted?
ulcer and sore throat just recover.
life is a bundle of shit now.

missed a prac coz i went to the doc's.
did some screen. take out some blood. ouch.
had nightmares, went to my sis room sleep for few nights.
gosh.

mostly is my body failing me.

i think i m going to die.
it is the innermost kinda feeling.
hmm.
i went for rebond some days ago. cant rembr.
coz i just wanna try everything.
the effect is giving me a different feeling but then i still prefer my old style.
though, no regrets here.

i wanna be good to my mum.
i wanna donate blood.

there is so many wanna.
dont wanna die.
eek.

or have anything bad.
tsk.

after the ubin trip

2005-06-20T21:26:00.000-07:00

Eeeeeeeeee.
Life is good. all things balance out huh.
as long as we get used, as long as we get contented.
wad can go so wrong?

haha. its monday. i m at my working desk.
i ve got the monday blues.
i had my share of fun during practicals but also a dose too many of blurness.
shit. the vision is all fogging in front of me. but seriously i do have to admit the fact tt my vision make a turn for the worse after i enter Optom.

argh.
monday blues. Pple cant stop calling in. i cant get a wink.
just came back from ubin on sun. gotta work from mon to wed.
i m so screwed up.

oh. i ve got a ulcer in my mouth.
its horrifyingly PAIN.
its killing me BIG TIME.
i just freaking realise i like to whine too.
hahaha.

i wanna laugh my days away.
let it be that way ok.

but i m waking up at 6 am tmr.
teach me how.

depressed

2005-06-13T22:42:00.000-07:00

i was sitting in front of my computer.
just came back from meeting quiqiu. today w practical was fun. nth's tt wrong. but
sumtink like just flash by and there i visualised myself crying to bed.
..

havent feel like tt in forever.
man i just want constancy in my life. not normality. its security.
maybe i m thinking too much, maybe i m paranoid..maybe there are so many maybes.
come what may. there were times when i doubt what say

shit. maybe thats life.

2005-06-07T19:42:00.000-07:00

when life gets horribly packed and busy,
when its all work and study and sch and bf [lol]
it feels good to know that there are pple out there who wanna grab just a moment with you. People who didnt forget you despite their own busy schedule
people who dont wana lose you
people who might just remain in ur life for a very long period of time. =]

forwarded msgs as simple as they seem, put a smile on my face.
miss calls signify something
typed msgs brighten up days.

friends. wad wud life be w/o them. hheehe
i so love being sc.
i so love my friends.
i so love my darling.

life is good.

seriously school is kinda moving FAST.
still not in the schooling mood.
tink i will be quitting this very good job soon.
i cant breathe fast enough for life.

sch reopen

2005-05-31T19:23:00.000-07:00

my very pretty life just crashed dwn on me.
haha.
sch just reopen. i guess its been so long since i last blog.
my life is still preetty. i found something i nv tot i need. [i-u]
hahaha.
i dont hate sch reopen BUT the DOPT class just splited into TWO. how shit is that. 6 sis split into 3-3.
HT in different class as me. and her timetable is better than mine!! how shit is that.
for lab assignment i heard i might partner w a guy who forward his module. [ht say one]
OMG. . .
i almost study 8-5 everyday. b4 i saw the split class timetable, i had a timetable as beautiful as anything. but now. HOW SHIT IS THAT??!!?!?!
OMGOMGOJMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. shit la.

today wake up @ 6.3o go sch halfway w ht receive msg that the lecturer is sick. dont need come. how shit is that!! ct msg in the morning she sick not going. how i wished i cant wake up. how shit is that?
omg. so i decided to pon the whole day coz i had aa 4hr break after the morning class. but after the 4hr break got a fierce lecturer class.
how shit is that!!
hahahaha. piece of shit. tell me life will be good.

nth is perfect huh.
tell me what is.

after exam!

2005-04-15T00:46:00.000-07:00

lalalala.
the happiness is within. its quiet and explosive at the same time.
exams are over. finally. if not wadever you do, there will be something deep inside that you let go. haha. i m tired. i m happy. i m satisfied. i m quite glad i m sc.
went to sakae w ht mel hong teing ling. 6 sisters..
haha.
then kbox..
then pool.

i ate like crazee. i sang like mad.
life shud be like that. shudnt it?
i m seriously tired. i get insomia every nit.
something is wrong with me?

=]

"zhi ba wo sheng ming tai duan" is a nice phrase.

the presentation

2005-04-01T00:37:00.000-08:00

i feel the need to blog. i m gettin senile. i want to remember. i want to blog.

b4 anything. i wanna say: pam. u shocked me with that message. if you are reading. :]

yest: just had a test. haha. do until like shit. but also received satisfactory results from previous tests. + factor. then went shopping spree for formal clothes with ht. then very late then hit the pillows coz didnt manage to finish the presentations stuff.

haha. its drawing closer to the exams already. fast isnt it?
haha. this morning just had a presentation.
it was a tangle of nervousity and excitement? and a lil freak-out feeling that i always get.
but it was kinda a success to me. hehehe. irene tan comment that i was confident? matters to me.

then i went for a job interview with sook hong melissa and yiling + 2 seniors at raffles some tower-like building.
the boss says he is alright with me. hehehe. though he will shortlist. i guess its like another reassurance.

JOB: ard 8-10/ hour+commission at high traffic optical shop. have to reach a quota. dont sell product directly to consumers. required to be proactive to convey the new lens + points and bring awareness to the public.

i got a darn feeling history gonna repeat itself. it is something like the telemarker job. eek. but then again. its like an experience b4 i get to the society to work. another + factor. another challenge that i might wanna take up. another view i wanna see.

but then again. that is if i got short listed.

after which, i went out with mr CHEOK WEISHIN.
haha. eh. watched 3 iron. damn nice ok. finally caught it. i dont wanna miss it. its abstract. simply a shudnt-miss show.
i ate the pack of pop corns.
i m growing fat.

then i struggle my way back to lot 1. went kpool. i wanna die.
it might be due to me being an direction idiot that leads to my poor ability to aim. huh?
hahaha.

then ard 9 he wanted to eat.
and i ate sum fried thinky. u see. at this rate i m going. god knows wad gonna happen to me.
horrible.

now i m typing this entry. i have no idea when will be my next.
tmr i going out with wenzi.

** the stupid shoe caused me 2 blisters on each leh.
the huge one on my right feet havent burst. its scary.

today is hectic. i m almost late for presentation.
actually i m glad that i have frenz to help me thru my life. u guys know who u are.
i m so messy and blur.
=]

i m a happy girl.

just now it dawned on me that.
in life, let go of things when its time.
treasure those that treasure you.
some pple as impt as they are in the earlier part. they gradually fade away.
perhaps there is really no point in holding back. thats life.

long time no write

2005-03-23T15:57:00.000-08:00

omg.
it has been so long since i blogged.
reading wad i wrote and recalling has a good feeling in me.
i m gettin so freaking tired of the life i m having. school, tests, exams. wheres life.
gosh. horrible horrible horrible.
hmm. i m at home now later going out with wenzi. TB outing change day.
i need ta get formal wear. haha.

schedule outline:
thurs: TB outing
fri: KTV and ms congenality with sec frends
sat: running and kbox with anata
sun: study!

next
mon: chris test
tues: Gems results
wed: LJJ test.

i tink it was last sat that i went wenzi house to overnit study.
TB study camp eh?
haha. but she freaky la. didnt manage to study much. i dont understand.
actually her house not bad. mayb is the familarity, i dont know. i sleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. even when there is no air-con. remember i had a whip potato and oh ta thingy. i dont like oh ta. but wenzi like it. damn lots. eek. but eat already it doesnt taste all that bad. lol.

i dont know what i m looking for.
sometimes i say things for the moment.
not that i dont mean it. just that it wouldnt last. i guess.
i m so young. life seems like a burden already. i m living so tiredly. sometimes i cant find the energy to talk. yet i m aware of the happiness and effects that life can bring if i let it.
there is something deep down i dont wanna blog down or perhaps, dont wanna admit.
reality converge. i m not ready.
maybe i need to change my thinking.

this is what i wana say. saying it all out makes the whole thing better.

the old folks home

2005-03-05T19:21:00.000-08:00

my god.
life is definitely hectic.
everything passed me by before i can shout stop.

thurs:had 2 tests!!
omg. it was terrible. aint?
i feel like tearing the papers. i told myself tmr would be a better day. i come to realise i must cherish days which are considered comfortably unexciting.
after that went long john and a movie HITCH with Ht and houston.
it was a damn funny show. 4 stars? haha.
alot of show i wanna catch.
3 iron is one of them and the outdated hide and seek-

fri: known as TB bash.
it wasnt counted. we were just too tired to make it late into the night.
nvtheless. it was nice. as alwiz
haha. we went to swensen's -town.
i had fish and chips and her a chicken thingy. lol.
haha. we had a change of seats around 4 times. and in the end we were still not satisfied with the final choice. we were PICKY i guess.
after that we went walking around.
went far east basement some shop to grab a ice tea. we were suffering from severe sore throat. we made it a point to stop taking those fats into our body. catch a nit movie. a series of unfortunate events.. haha. i was excited when i recalled i read its storybook before. haha.

sat: i woke up at 7.30 . to go to old folk's home to do CIP. villa francis home for the age.
when life becomes a tangle of unrealistic mess and artificial filaments. its time to do good deeds. haha.
supposed to go work. but i m simply too tired.
and i m still tired. gotta log off. lots of reports to get done. i m done for

a moment to remember

2005-02-20T17:39:00.000-08:00

it is sunday today.
i finally got the time to stay at home.
life is definitely hectic.

fri [1802]
went out with wenzi. as usual our TB outing.
haha. we went HAN's again. and ate spag+FRIES. ok. its damn fattening. i almost cant stand the fact that ive got such a chubby face.
we bought a TB ring [it looks like a crown. it has black diamond-like crystals and cross]. haha. and we went thru a series of procedures [fire extinguisher area 02 far east] to put it on.
forefinger-
in moments like this, i wud be thinking:
in life, we need to have so much things to remember, maybe then..we all wun waste the meaning of our existence before our journey is all over..
haha
then we went walking around and saw chingay. its the rehearsal.
its fascinating. we were all oohs and ahhs. hahah. we saw giants!! the guy's hands were like soo BIG. and i mean big.
hahaha. sometimes i tink i like giants. and some other very tall creatures walking on stilts. i feel like i m not living in the reality. but perhaps some utopia kinda thinky. dreamy and beautifully imaginary.
i feel small. and i would for that instant, forget the way the world works. all the harshness and superficiality..
after that we went to watch [a moment to remember]
omg. it was so sad. i think its the first time i cried during a movie.

perhaps..maybe..i understand how sorry the girl was in the letter, how she wish she could turn back time. so sincerely saying " i love you" to the guy she love in the eye yet calling her ex' name.

she ve got a eraser in her head.

the show is bit and pieces of sweetness.

after the show it was so late. we took NR3 hm.
wenzi called shin after she left. and he send me home.
oh ya. i met alot of pple in town that day. =]

sat: actually was suppose to go SA funfair with wenzi shin and ky. but i got a nose infection. nise swollen!! and ky cant wake up. in the end. it was cancelled.
in the afternoon i worked. and eat. again. help.
haha. after that me and shin go watch a moment to remember. he didnt cry.
it was beyond my assumption.

just met shin. pass him cash and pone.
i m getting a new pone.

now i m going out with my sister to catch my dinner.
it better be nice. hehee.
life. come what may-
i m feeling so hot now. the weather kills.

chinese new year 2005

2005-02-12T00:45:00.000-08:00

i went back to malaysia this chinese new year.

first time in my whole life i had fireworks exploding above me. real fireworks you see during national day. it was like: the clock strike 12, everywhere started to exploded. there were loud bombing sound everywhere. the night sky was filled with beautiful sparks of colours. its as lovely as can be. there are 101 kinds of fireworks. really alot of different types. i was amazed and stunned.
i still remember there was once i ran up a hill, plateau to look at the fireworks. who know it didnt really shoot that high..or perhaps it was my imagination. the firworks were near to exploding above my head. as the sparks lit up the night sky. me and my sister ran down the hill in fright. really is RUN.
another experience was that a firework wasnt place properly. it rolled down the hill and exploded halfway down the hill.
it was frighteningly shocking.
i had the feeling of being in a drama.
where everything esle doesnt feel reality.

haha. it was a once in a life time thing.
got a few hurt themself.
as this exploding continue late into the late, i got the sense of danger it brings with it.
saw the newpaper that says a guy late 20 got exploded when he went to check out one of the fireworks that retard in firing off.

got ya. i gained weight.
eating eating eating and non-stop.
freak!! nobody stop eating. it will be so weird if you dont eat late into the night.

haha. i gambled. but so much lesser then everybody esle.
hehe. at first i won so many but gradually lost them all away.
no gain no lost.
haha. i get no kick. thats why stopped playing.

i gotta update tmr.
now gotta call wenzi. she wanna update.

haha. just got shin msg from malaysia.

tmr going malaysia

2005-02-07T18:56:00.000-08:00

when angels fall in love, heaven knows..does it show.. haha.
long time i didnt update.
i guess i was busy and all.
haha. tomorrow i going malaysia. the past weeks flew pass like a blur mist. exams + work + many things else = the split second-
life is great i must say. haha. one must learn to get satisfied.

i m having fun working. knowing new friends learning new things and seeing all things esle from a different perpective and views.
school have been fine. bunch of friends around. but it is mostly about the independency and things i m learning.
time really change a person i think. haha. no doubt i tink i grew to be more decisive. and perhaps confident. lol.

omg. jap. i m missing out on alot of lesson. help. i m such a freak. 300++ there is definitely a voice screaming inside of me to ask me to study hard and not give up.. hahaha.

fri=last day b4 term break. did a lousy test but cudnt care much. haha.
eh. went out on TB outing. ya. met kevin in sch. he came for opening.
hmm.i designed the form for the TB outing this time. haha.
was supposed to go HOLLAND V. but a series of eerie event leads us to orchard. haha.
ate at RAMENTEN.
wad shit. i wun go there again.
hahaha.
but the outing didnt suck. but wenzi leg hurt due to her new shoe.
btw. we create a song. goes like this:

i love you. u love me.
u no money dont find me.
have a big big car please come drive me
if got vespa i dont mind.

love love and love me [wenzi]
treat me ice cream and GUCCI
big hairy chest is all i ever want.
i wil love you till the end of time

lyric by sc and wenzi. lol.

sat= kbox with anata. =] done the catching up we needed then she sent me to work[4-10].
we ate mini melts which caused me to be late for work!! haha. but we got two free key chains. haha. sweet eh. hhaa. =]
shin later came to send me hm sweet hm.
and i ate a ice cream from some orchard road side ice cream uncle and crab and cheese pizza from 7-11. so fattening. that idiot shin didnt stop me at all. i hate him. haha.

sun=work. haha. cashier bar for the very first time. was real hectic. i tot i hated maths but apparently i had great fun using the cashier with its constant springy drawer. haha. i also had super freaky great time scoping ice cream and making them. thou most of the time is david help me wan. hahaha. cashier bar is a mad house david claims. i tink it is definitely a springy place. cashier drawer..drinks pressors..ice cream scooper..
hehe.
=] knew a new girl. nisa. nice girl.
i broke a glass. was so stunned i stood rooted for the sec. she came in and help me swept it all away.
haha. considerate and nice to tok to.
after that shin come fetch me home. my feet crack i tink. with the weight of me resting on that heels. help. haha.
ate the middle of my hawa pizza w mushroom. he ate the crust. lol

after that hui na called and we chatted for abt 1hr. it amazed me the content we talk about.

days in pizza hut. 8 out of 10 will be happiest days. i dont know why. haha.
maybe because 1 day out of 7 i m working. lol.

i woke up at 10 today. ate breakfast and went back to slp at 11. shit. fattening.

anata just called. haha. she cannot find her last bottom for new year. i dont know shud laugh or wad.
wenzi leg deformed coz of her shoe.
my CIP request of going to the zoo finally [succeed]
haha. life is great eh.
=] i m suddenly too happy.

the first meeting for the taste buddies

2005-01-15T00:10:00.000-08:00

today is the first meeting of the TB. hee
i had great fun.
i nv really had that much interest in the esplanade. i didnt want to appreciate what everybody esle sees.
yet as i was eating ah pek's ice cream beside the river today. i guess i felt something esle within..
thai express was our destination.
hmm. next would be al denta.
and i wanna go black angus.

life got its meaning.
i love the feeling i had today.
but everyday=happy days. then happy days= ..
life.
haha. i am so damn tired.
i ate so much.
i visualise myself expanding non-stop horizonatally. but i dont tink i will stop.
i m in love IN food. lol.

some friendship. is worth going all out to preserve.
=]

life

2005-01-10T22:23:00.000-08:00

long time didnt update.
sch starts and the days shortened.
all i register nowadays is the fact that food never leave me.
or i will never leave food.
haha.
i am engaged in a intimate relationship with food.
yesterdays went to a new place to eat.
phin's steakhouse. ate fish and chips. their ice tea sucks!!
haha. went with wenzi after my work. * i had a spagetti earlier. it was sc-done. haha.
=]
had fun tasting food and giving very constructive comments.
we get to interested we decided to go ma kan at different place every fri.
we have decided to create comment sheets etc.
this is life..sweet sour bitter spicy..
the elements of life is found in food itself.
oh ya. we decided to name ourselves TB. taste buddies. lol

today after sch went to LET'S EAT with hwee teng.
haha. ate so much i tink i gain a freaking amnt of some fats. this is scary.
somehow things always get out of control when i am faced with food.
lol.

mm..today for character development got a skit. was the female lead eh.
i got PREGNANT. LOL.
kinda affect me alot. i keep tinking i was really pregnant.
haha.
life eh..
i hope some things remains the same.
i know time has destructive effect on certain things.
how i wish.
at least there is some constant.

oh ya. there is this guy felix..i hope one day i will know his identity.

life

2004-12-21T04:28:00.000-08:00

christmas is coming.
life is good.
=]
haha.
so many things happen but so lazy to type it down
dont know where to start to.
but i want a black christmas!!

another contradicting post

2004-12-18T13:46:00.000-08:00

i just received a damn contradicting msg w regard to the entry i made just now.
it says:
been thru a few wedding ceremony le..
and everytime when the bride and groom thanks their mum..they teared..
think we'll nv know how much they love us until we become mum.

everything is constantly changing.
my anger is gone.
the bittereness still there thou.
part and parcel of life.

btw.
in the morning i watched "view from the top"
summary:
this girl is chasing her dream. flight attendence in paris/new york. a movie i missed.
sumhow althou there are twists and turns and many pitfalls, backstabs and betrayal.
she manage to reach what she call her destiny.
however, she realised it is not what she have been looking for all along.

at this moment everytink points to the fact that life is just such a beautiful lie-
huh

personality clashes

2004-12-18T13:19:00.000-08:00

mine simply clashes w hers.
i need to type.
she is driving me to the edge.
she dont know what she is toking abt.
neither does she get what i meant.
our lives is totally different although she is so closely related to me.
my head works w two personnel.
i dont wan to care about everything doesnt mean i m never serious about some things.
the basic foundation of trust does not exist between me and her.
we are worlds apart.
and it breaks my hart-

i know what want

2004-12-16T21:29:00.000-08:00

i want an imp tattoo+a black closet.

long time no write

2004-12-14T19:40:00.000-08:00

sch reopened the second day.
i saw my time-table.
it wasnt so packed
lots of breaks. it was better then the previous.
life is
------------------
u know. simply a constant.
i dont know what to expect of myself.
i want different things at different point of time.
life gotta be more than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me.

btw. just now went downstairs.
i saw a daddy cycling his lil ballerina home.
its such a pretty sight.
i paused and sink into that very moment.

i went to my GEMS class today.
Astro-navigation.
i always thought stars were the amazing thing in life. one of the beautiful wonders.
mayb it still is.
but i think at this rate the teacher is going. the class might sleep.
[ i dont believe i cant find my star one day]

-i m learning to blend in this lifeless society-

36 ballons

2004-12-11T21:45:00.000-08:00

36 helium pink+white ballons with message in them.
-received-

the love-hate-relationship

2004-12-10T23:36:00.000-08:00

dear diary.
i think life is very fair?
i alwiz have a great time in the morning. when its time to go home. i seem to plunge into some very frightening depth.
wad exist between my family somewhat can be describe as a love-hate-relationship. everynit i also can quarrel with my mum. it totally pissed me off and destroy all the pleasant mood that was cultivated earlier. its hopeless.
she is a perfectionist with regard to the household chores.
i m not her.
i dont really care if i have a neat bed. or a messy one.
anyway, i thought i was the one slping on my bed?
and my room, wardrobe, table will NEVER be neat.
doubt she can ever appreciate the art of my mess.

=]
this morning was supposed to go sun tanning w wenzi at sentosa. but as usual, we were very late in getting up,in preparing, in reaching, in eating breakfast..and it was near sunset before we knew it.
change of plans and we went bugis.
haha. then we went shopping. with our very heavy beach bags.

then we were supposed to go suntec- TIMES. i wanna buy christmas cards. but then we went woodlands to cut my hair instead.
[ change of plans is the normal-est tink when two fickled minded person come together ]
then i pester wenzi to eat the very nice kaya toast tink at causeway.
she was so reluctant. haha. but my persistent resulted in a [ its the nicest toast i ve ever eaten. ] from her.
not bad eh. haha.

then shop shop again then we go and eat AGAIN. haha. mos burger.
haha
wenzi say.
[ u cannot control yourself but you can control me ]
she keep on say her face becoming rounder and rounder.
omg. its so hilarious. Geez.

just now pizza fren msg to ask me takeover her on sunday.
its my sis bday that day.
there gonna b a steamboat.
i told my fren i cannot help her.
...
but i am still angry w my sis.

i dont want sch reopen.

btw. i never add tagboard in my blog.
=]

after the steamboat

2004-12-09T00:42:00.000-08:00

a very beautiful day.
but spoilt by my mum a few minutes ago. alamak-

i had a great time today. actually.
me and jia xing decided to go supermarket to buy fruits to xuan ru house.
hehe.
grapes and green apples.
haha. we ate alot. dammit. i so full until i cudnt exactly sit properly.
and my mum expect me to stop using the com and get to slp.
she is an idiot or sometink rit.
the world is so sick.

we took lots of pictures. hehehe. one of which is me trying to kiss jia xing. i like that. haha
this is the third time the three of us ate steamboat at xr house le.
its a nice feeling.
i remembered we named ourselves in which the name i cant remember. lol.

after which, jia xing and me went to k pool [lot 1] to play. i had a nasty game. haha. then jin long and zai tian to the rescue.
jin long say he help me. fine. he did shoot the ball into the port. it was a solid. and i m strip.
idiotic anot. hehehe.
had fun.
jia xing was really sweet when she accompany me to the 302 bus stop.
haha. it was a moment kinda thing.
=]

the real diary

2004-12-08T16:15:00.000-08:00

i just bath.
very tired. didnt slp until 5++
didnt go to the beach because of that too.
and the sun is like shinning so brightly today. haha.
the way heaven alwiz turn their back on us simply sucks.

i was reading my diary. the ones i had before i start to blog.
diary entries. nevertheless are private.
i questioned myself on the worth of blogging.
and.. why i am blogging.

the good
-faster and easier
-typing is faster then writing
-it gives an satisfaction when i see my blog.
-it has the auto date and time and sign off stuff.

the bad
-i dont say everything
-i cant say some things

wad now.
stop or continue.

haha.
=] some things when changed, you can never get it back for sure.
the feelings wun remain.
friendships or relationships or even myself.
once its gone.
its gone.
thats is. no matter how beautiful it once was..

shit. later gonna eat steamboat.
i m getting fatter everyday.

and best friend is obsessed with 3 dvds.
he better let me watch them.
hee.

at wen house

2004-12-08T01:37:00.000-08:00

i just came back from the movie. After the sunset. pretty nice show. something quite special happened at CCK cinema. the computers SPOIL. gosh. i got a type of ticket i nv in my whole life got.
DESCRIPTION: pink. filmsy. free seating-
haha. cool anot. =]

haha. the show talk about the women using her body, sexuality as a greater temptation to stop the man from stealing the diamond. [ the diamond prettier than the women ]
these few days, watched shows that was created to let people marvel at the amazing human brain. the way people plan things and the fact that the plan work.

i am at wenzi house now.
just ate supper. again. this is terribly horrible.
haha. hmm. and coffee ice cream w milo flakes!!
and wenzi had an additional cup of MILK. the drink i wud nv pour into that esophagus of mine. yucks. lol.
wenzi just bath out. she is wearing a pink shirt and a FBT. gosh. she is trying to seduce me!! my fav COLOUR and that TINY WEENIE pants!! pornstar she say. then she tell me her FBT got a hole. u see..
LOL. =]
haaha. oh ya. we did clean up our kitchen mess. using a very innovative method worr. next time u dont want to wash plate use this method:
1- wear a glove on one hand
2-ask ur partner to wear the other.
3- use the two different hands to coordinate!
[ i m a super pro as u can see. we didnt break any plates even thou wenzi is like so damn CLUMSY ]

hee. =]

she is rubbing body moisturiser.
she didnt ask me to help her. silently tempting me again. i cant stand it. i will rape her later. hahaha. but i got a feeling she gonna rape me.

and she is rubbing moisturiser on me now. and Ah wu calling her. now.
and like she is so dammit blissfully happy.
i m jealous. i will kill her later. haha.

i want my man to watch sunsets with me.
and i know he will.
he will make that extension thing. and place the sun bathing seats.
i know he will.

can you trust in that longing, and take control?

the love a guy have for a girl gonna last for only 3 yrs

2004-12-07T18:27:00.000-08:00

hmm. nth much.
just wanna write down sometink. i heard from felicia. quite proven.
A guy's love for a girl can only last for 3 years.

do alot of tinks days

2004-12-07T01:31:00.000-08:00

today was a DO-LOTS-OF-THINGS day.
in the morning, me and anata was supposed to go running. but it was raining.
then we go lot one. played pool. i m a violent girl. so i still play until damn violent. haha.
dont deny i admire the way the ball can move slowly too..
i play halfway, suddenly realise, pool gonna be a sad game for me..

then me and anata went to orchard, LIDO to watch SAW [ a movie i long wanted to watch ]
hmm. its a nice show, shows the pyschological level of a person damn high.
and very gorri. --. I was screaming HORRIBLE all the way. lol.
one of the interesting phrase from the show is : to understand the trap, you have to appreciate the beauty of it. or sometink like that. not bad eh.

then we went lotsa shops to try clothes so many i almost cant remember how many. fun ok. just that i need to SLIM DOWN BIG TIME!!
it was nitnit when we get outta orchard, then wanna go fulfill our afternoon dream of running. too bad gombak the stadium close.
anata freak me out and i screamed all the way out of the stadium. idiot. =]

now talking to wenzi. she had the same fate as me today.
btw. i lost a diary.
all my frends rox.

i cant get to sleep

2004-12-04T02:36:00.000-08:00

i cant get to sleep
this is horrible.
because i feel so worn out
because the thoughts are running all over the boundaries of my head.
this is so sick.

4/8 chalet 1th-3th

2004-12-03T15:06:00.000-08:00

it is to update about the 4/8 chalet which is from 011204-031204.
Different lives coming back together. definitely not easy. thanks the organisers!!
hehe.
=]
had fun. the first nit slept for only 2 and a half hours?
i laugh till i had sore throat? love the laughter all around.
did some idiotic stuff that i nv tot i was capable of?
eat DAMN LOTs. EeEeeKkKkk!!
and i learnt MA JIONG. someday i gonna be the ma jiong princess! hee.
felt so damn tired and lazy that i had to leave the 2nd night because i cannot fathom waking up the next day at 9 to check out.
it was great just seeing everyone. knowing how they have been. widening scope..
They say the best friends you ever had is in your secondary school days. i dont deny?
haha.
come what may.

Just another CSR day

2004-11-30T02:45:00.000-08:00

forgive me but i can't be everything you deserve
and i know it's too late to crawl back to you tonight
but there's a few things that i just need you to know
like the way i felt when you were close
and how the stars exploded every time you are near
and all along you were there waiting
like you said you always would
ya. you said you always would
[ just nice. isnt it]

haha. CSR today. nice day. wasnt that hectic. ate a capsicum+mushroom+chicken ham spagettic and drank the ribbon pasta and cream of the mushroom.
one of the wonder of pizza Hut is that you get to create your toppings and get unlimited flow of pizza and the sorts. this comes with the worst outcome. expanding hortizontally unlimit-less!
GOSH.

hup kee or luan.

2004-11-29T04:09:00.000-08:00

idiot wenzi is sitting on the bed beside me now.
she say she very tired and is rubbing her panda eyes.
haha.
today. well-spent i guess. not one of the days i regret. [of course: wenzi ]
work was pleasent today. rather fun. i laugh till tears came?
hmm. was supposed to be CSR but appeared in the old white uniform instead of the current red blackie white one. but the manager ask me to dress properly tmr cause he gonna put me as CSR again.
[ i hope tmr dun have tt auntie ]
eh. Just now wenzi me and shin went to watch Bridget Jones Diary: the edge of reason.
was supposed to catch SAW but i guess it wasnt meant to be.
THE WHOLE OF ORCHARD DONT HAVE IT!!
it was a nice movie though. me and wenzi shared a chicken ham + pepperoni spagetti. =] heh.
then after that went to [ Place Of Shit ] as we named it. the eatery beside orchard point.
ate so much i tink i expanded horizontally a 100 times. arghh..

gonna hangover at wenzi house. dont remember how many times this is.
hehe.

my best friend salinla.

2004-11-28T14:26:00.000-08:00

talking to sc now. my BESTFRIEND. and she is in america. she is doing a paper.
"should flag burning be banned"
hmM. a pang of nostalgic feeling alwiz surface whenever we talk.
i love her alot. no doubt. i pray that nothing changes our friendship, not the culture or time, or even the exposure to other things.
she let me understand its never fun if we dont see both sides.

haha. i just force her to flaunt her english:
-Courage Doesn't always roar.
Somtimes, courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying i will try again tomorrow.
-"e juice is worth the squeeze"
-beauty is a mystery hidden in the shadow of youth
-luv means nt ever having to say "i told u so"
-dun tke life seriously.. it isnt permanent
-a best fren is gonna alwiz be one [ haha. she is a freak. this is OUR phase]

U know where you stand in this hart of mine. cos some things never change.
we cont to have fun. at the end of the day, i might just tell you what happened. deep down i hope you and me were having fun. together.

holiday will be over before i even know it.

2004-11-28T02:31:00.000-08:00

Holiday will be over before i even know it.
i hope time comes to a stand still now.
toking to wenzi now. she is a piece of shit. lol.
she say nobody want to eat her cookies. and i think she wants to give them to me.
btw. she tell me slping is a form of diet.
if its true, even pigs can fly.

jay concert.

2004-11-27T01:45:00.000-08:00

UNUSUAL PRODUCTIONS

presents

" Incomparable To Jay"

World Tour 2004.

went to Jay's concert today. hmm. A23. Row 10. Entrance South.

it was never until today that i really like Jay.

Guess he is a combination of musical talents and a mysterious kinda aura.

i fell in love with his PINK piano. i was mesmerised by the way he play piano

[ u have not the least idea how fast his fingers hit the keys and the absolute team work tt he had w the other guy ]

and amazed that he knows how to play the flute too.

there, i truly felt the strength and the beauty of his voice. haha.

wen lan, JJ and Nan Quan MaMa came too.

the constant fireworks that exploded always caught me off guard.

hmm. there was the JAY's! spirit in the air. i saw how many pple like him. GOSh. no lesser than 10 000? not including yesterday's performance..

i waved a green lit stick.

today was fun. i like today.

he gave me a tiara today. From Swarovski. but

i rather own one that is weave from grass.

a stand still.

2004-11-26T09:00:00.000-08:00

Here's to the crazy ones.
The misfits.
The rebels.
The trouble-makers.
The round pegs in the square holes.
The ones who see things differently.
They're not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status-quo.
You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them.
But the only thing you can't do is ignore them.
Because they change things.
They push the human race forward.
And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius.
Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

after everything, my life seems to be coming to a stand still.

fate ar. haha

2004-11-25T17:55:00.000-08:00

the meeting was no doubt a beautiful one.
i was walking home after my typhoid injection at shaw house #15-01 w ky. after which he went to work.
it was drizzling. my area was rather deserted.
i wasnt running from the rain. i simply walk. fate and the subject of love was all on my mind.
then i saw this guy. eye contact. he was wearing a cap. he appear so cool. MY TYPE OF GUY.
i noticed there was a scar on his face. i like the way he is so rugged?

i didnt want to look more.

after i pass him, instinctively i turned back for another glance.
i caught him turning back too. i turned around..
my short love story ended.
hee.

flowers and chocolates

2004-11-25T01:05:00.000-08:00

flowers , plastic one in the middle. and chocolates.
GIRLS' all time favourite.
+ " i ll love you until the last one die "

i tink i m running a fever.

reality knows no apologetic hart.

2004-11-24T08:40:00.000-08:00

first time do CSR. the tie kinda make me impress with myself. haha.
but sudden rush of customer cocked up even the most beautiful day.
got bad blood with one of the auntie there liao la. lol.
saw long-time-no-see fren. Pam. we were both so shocked. her fren thought the pizza CSR went bonkers..

today realise. the world kinda really harsh. haha. in the service industry, sorry doesnt convey the meaning of tint of true regrets, but it reflect sucumbing to a person's anger.

".. only the strong will survive"

i sound so-not-me. haha. =] its only a spur of the moment kinda feeling. i hope in the future i get to experience another fact of life that contradict this?

come to think of it.
Humans are simply so weird.
BEAUTIFULLY WEIRD.

hmm. today results out.
gosh. i didnt get any satisfaction out of it. but m just glad i pass with alright grade.
In life, why need to hope for so much. it will only make you hard on yourself.

MODULE CODE MODULE GRADE
MS2101 MATHEMATICS A
CP2038 ANATOMY & PHYSIOLOGY I B
CP4001 ANALYTICAL & PHYSICAL CHEMISTRY B+
SP0202 INNOVATION DESIGN & ENTERPRISE IN ACTION (IDEA) B+
CP3008 HUMAN BIOCHEMISTRY C
CP3034 GENERAL OPTICS C+
LC0218 CRITICAL REASONING SKILLS C+

emotion turmoil. Nan De zHi xin DAng 11th anniversary.

2004-11-23T01:52:00.000-08:00

So you call me cheap but yet you want me.
Say I've hurt you but pretend to be nice.
You write one thing yet speak another.
You weren't perfect once before, but neither are you now.
He isn't either, but it's different.
The change was too drastic; maturity failed me.
Selfish and alone, I had to answer my own needs.
My seeds of apology are nothing compared to the weight of your turmoil.
Worry's sake; I think about you every day.
So you're told I'm guilty, that's a testament of truth.
But it's no point tapping on my back door for my dreams of fallen tears in the past will soon wash my guilt away
.Though your hate for me will always stay, I pray one day you'll awake realizing it takes two, and that her happiness is the basic pillar for yours.

my predestined fate?

TODAY:

hmm. today. wad a day.
gosh. ky forget to tell me i change schedule. made a wasted trip to orchard. but in the end everytink turned out fine. went to eat dinner w agnes and huilin. mm..play pool. got weng shin AJ kok how..
today lots of mood swings. my mood varies like the consine curve. maybe worse?
ahaha.
looked down from cck mrt platform, saw lots of pebbles below..i feel so small.
dawned on me. i do lead a beautiful life..but lost in this beautiful world...

Nan De zHi xin

Just receive a very sweet msg from chairman when i was talking to wenzi.
then follow by another sweet msg from wenzi.
then..ky's. nice one too
this afternoon was still dicussing w huilin how to celebrate.
we are all busy.
but the truth is, i will try my best to not lose anytink. or anyone.
=]
[ never let a good friendship die, just because you never had the time to say.."Hi" ]

for him. may life be smooth?

2004-11-22T23:55:00.000-08:00

my best friend just hanged up w me. not long ago.
he sounds so troubled.
he doesnt want to tell me wads wrong.
this sucks.
he wanna see the drafts of my not-ready-blog this morning. i didnt want to start today. but i want to show him.
cos he sounds like he is not coming back for christmas.
that sucks too.
tkecare. wadever is on your mind. =]